與子觀化 - Klaudius’ weblog

PM黑话录

黑话 1：I don’t want to be the bottle-neck.

解释： I really don’t want to do any concrete thing for the project. I am the manager.

黑话 2：Let me give you a high level brief

解释： I don’t know any detail, let’s repeat the meaningless words again.

黑话 3：You cannot make such assumption, leave the question for high level meeting.

解释： I won’t help you, you should decide by your own and take risk by your own. If you make things right, that will be exactly what “managers” want. If you make things wrong, that’s your fault.

黑话 4：We have not decided yet.

解释： We won’t decide it forever.

PM创世纪

PM说：“要有人” 一群程序员出现了

PM说：“要有文档” 文档出现了

PM说：“要有代码” 代码出现了

PM说：“要有系统” 系统出现了……错了，不是系统，是BUG

PM说：“要有测试” 测试员出现了

PM说：“要Fix BUG” …..一半程序员辞职了

PM说：“要有人” 一批Fresh graduates出现了，另一半程序员辞职了

PM说：“要有OutSource” OutSource公司出现了

PM说：“要有系统” 系统出现了

PM说：“要Release” PM辞职了